Missouri's been around for a long time.  And well, times have definitely changed. I figured, we need a laugh on a Friday, right? So, without further ado, here are seven Missouri town names that will probably make you uncomfortable.

1.  Cooter.

Cooter is a city in Pemiscot County. The population was 469 at the 2010 census. It's down in the bootheel. I don't think they meant the dirty way, but... still.

2. Knob Lick.

Knob Lick is an unincorporated community in southern Saint Francois County. It is located on Missouri Route DD just east of U.S. Route 67 about eight miles south of Farmington. I don't know why anybody is licking anything, but I'm not here to judge.

3. Lupus.

Lupus is a city in Moniteau County. The population was 33 at the 2010 census. It is part of the Jefferson City, Missouri Metropolitan Statistical Area. I want to believe this town is not named after a disease. That's just what my heart is telling me. And as we all know, it's never Lupus.

4. Quarles.

Quarles is an unincorporated community in Henry County. The community is located at the intersection of Missouri Route 13 and Missouri Route N about six miles north of Clinton. Sure, it's named after a dude, but seriously. Say that name out loud. Quaaarles.

5. Risco.

Risco is a city in New Madrid County. The population was 346 at the 2010 census. All I can think of when I hear this name is that it must be a kind of Risky Disco. I imagine people poking each other's eye out doing the John Travolta dance from Saturday Night Fever. "Well, seven injured tonight, twenty dead.... that's just the way of Risco."

Uncomfortably yours,
Behka